Why Love Hurts. A Sociological. Explanation. Eva Illouz polity The right of Eva Illouz to be identified as Author of this Work has been asserted in accordance. Why Love Hurts: A Sociological Explanation [Eva Illouz] on *FREE* shipping on qualifying offers. Few of us have been spared the agonies of. Editorial Reviews. Review. Winner of the ASA ‘Sociology of Emotions Recent Why Love Hurts: A Sociological Explanation – Kindle edition by Eva Illouz. Download it once and read it on your Kindle device, PC, phones or tablets.

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Illouz argues that endogamy helped to make the criteria for entering relationships as well as the roles performed by men and women in relationships unambiguous to pre-modern people. Her positioning of emotions as part of social structures is a timely provocation and makes a valuable contribution to, and indeed revitalises and reorients the sociology of emotions. Despite the widespread and almost collective character of these experiences, our culture insists they are the result of faulty or insufficiently mature psyches.

As the author states in the epilogue, her project has been to write a Marx for the feels. It would be interesting to read it in the light of the Metoo campaign.

Why Love Hurts – Eva Illouz

This, rather than personal deficiencies and flawed psyches, creates conflict and tension in many modern relationships. A Guide for Grownup Idealists. Workable on the page, but I doubt this epicene ideal is going to persuade in the bedroom. This is to say that it will get academically dense in some areas and she has a tendency to bring in multiple disciplines in order to justify a minor topic.

And it’s not to say the modernity has resulted in dismantling power structures of patriarchy. The problem is not dysfunctional childhoods or insufficiently self-aware psyches, but rather the institutional forces shaping how we love. To ask other readers questions about Why Love Hurtsplease sign up.


An Age of Broken Glances: On “Why Love Hurts” – Los Angeles Review of Books

He soon learns that all of London is talking about the work. Nov 27, Colleen rated it really liked it. But as Borges taught us, falling in love is creating a religion with a fallible god. Nowadays, we shy away from assigning blame in others because it would cause us to appear judgemental, but in fact, this separation of ethics and the realm of dating and relationships is what’s harmful.

Would you like to change to the site? Moreover, passionate love dispels the uncertainty and insecurity inherent in most interactions, and in that sense provides a very important source for understanding and enacting what we care about.

For instance, Live discusses the “objective” criteria that was used in pre-modern societies.

Why Love Hurts: A Sociological Explanation

The Governesses — Anne Serre. These categories entail a relentless disenchantment of love.

So whether in the realm of production or that of consumption, lobe have been actively mobilized, solicited and shaped by economic forces, thus making modern people simultaneously emotional and economic actors. They come in many shapes: Notify me of new posts by email.

Das Buch hat mir sehr gut gefallen. Illouz does not pine for an earlier world. Jan 18, Emily Jusuf rated it it was amazing Shelves: It pushes the puzzle of sociology to the brink: What is common to theme 1 and theme 2 is that both love and psychological health constitute utopias of happiness for the modern self, that both are mediated through consumption and that both constitute horizons to which the modern self aspires.

As a result, Illouz claims that suffering has lost its cultural cachet in modernity. Whether understanding the sociological underpinnings of suffering is enough to ease it remains to be seen. To see what your friends thought of this book, please sign up. In all of these realms, psychology established itself as the ultimate authority in matters of human distress by offering techniques to transform and overcome that distress.

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It seems like a case of convergent evolution to me. The problem is not dysfunctional childhoods or insufficiently self-aware psyches, but rather the institutional forces shaping how we love. What’s particularly interesting to me is how Illouz’s conclusions line up with those of other critics of modernity who start from very different points. One can also expect to find transcripts from personal interviews and interactions on Internet dating sites within the text.

With the advent of the Internet and social media networks we can all the more readily replace real interactions with manufactured ones.

But, Illouz asserts, there is no resulting sense of fulfilment in such a quest. Not that people are so literal, but the repeated images of beautiful human beings speaking laboriously polished lines with carefully directed expressions and accents cannot help but make the guy beside you, well, a bit of a shlub.

Previous post Next post. These exclusions, she argues, are justified because heteronormative love fuses the emotional and the economic, and, through her analysis, their disentanglement reveals the wider conditions at play which shape modernity. For her, this means that she excluded homosexual relationships from her study for fear of inconsistencies that could arise from love processes in same sex couples. Illouz’s point seems to be that our sociological context and expectations shape how “love” feels and manifests itself in our lives.

Illouz argues that while women are still told to settle down, men are given a different message that bases their masculinity on how much currency they hold in the sex market.

He did, replies his wife. As Harry Frankfurt put it, loving frees us from ev constraints and difficulties inherent in the fact of not knowing what to think, and, I would add, what to feel.